6/28/2006

You wanna hear the most annoying sound in the world?

Ha, couldn't let that Dumb and Dumber quote go untouched!

I wanted to express my anger and frustration to all those little sounds in my life that annoy the hell outta me! I wanna hear if anyone else has some weird sounds that they just can't stand... like this......

-A bug hitting the window trying to get out

Everytime I hear that, either inside my house or in my car I go crazy. I just want to squash the little bugger but since I hate the feel of them I usually leave the room, or if I'm in my car, stop the car, roll down my window and pray that it leaves. Usually it doesn't so then I rush in and save the day by shoo'n it with anything I can grab in my car, which is usually my ice scraper.

-Fingernails scratching on velcro or jeans

OH LORDY! This is a rare one, but oh my it has to be the worst one! My friends don't understand it, neither can I, but i'd rather have 100 bumblebees trying to get out of my car windows then hear that damn fingernail scratching!

-Putting on headphones and having one side work

This one is actually so bad that my body cramps up! SERIOUSLY! If the right ear isn't working my left side of my waist literally cramps up and I'm forced to lean into it causing me to rip the headphones off. I can actually have my right side do the same if I switch the headphones on. Does this happen with anyone else? It doesn't hurt, but it's the feeling you get when someone is tickling you, but it doesn't tickle, it just doesn't feel right so you yell at them to stop and they never do, so then you fake them into thinking it hurts.

-Shania Twain

Yah, nothing really to explain here, she just has one of the most annoying voices!

-Cutting freezer paper on those metal jaws of the edge of the box.

I blame this one on my mother! When we were younger and had everyone living at home, my mom had to feed supper for 6 people, so she usually bought meats in bulk, especially hamburger. Normally she would make 12 individual pound and a half sized pieces then freeze them using the paper. So she had to rip 12 pieces. But being that she is used to the motions everything is quick, but it's also freaking loud! Now when I come home and if I was in the same room, I usually have to stop what I'm doing and cover my ears till she is done.

That's all that I can think of, but I'm sure there will be more, some I haven't thought of, all it takes is for me to hear it and I'll be back on here as fast as speed racer

Silly Police, tickets are for, well, not me!

Ahh yes, yet another driving post. Driving is a way of life so why not blog it that way? All I have to say is that I get damn lucky at times! Especially when the word "Police" shows up.

Anyone living in any sort of small town knows a lot of secrets, especially if it pertains to law enforcement. You know which roads you could easily go 15 miles over the speed limit, (like the Warner road in Staples) and roads you can’t go above 5 miles the speed limit (like going through Verndale) They also know which spot will always have a sheriff there watching for speeders. (Like the corner before the Motley bridge heading south) I have been lucky the past 9+ years I have been driving, I have never once been pulled over. Well, until Friday before Memorial Day Weekend 2006 I wasn’t so lucky. BUT don’t feel bad just yet it gets better.

My Dad and I decided to go see a friend who is painting my Dad’s ‘68 GTO, just to see how things were going. We took my car, which happens to be a ‘94 Ford Taurus and drove the 7 miles to his place. I noticed a cop car sitting up on a hill checking for speeders and didn’t think much of it until I looked in my rearview mirror and saw his lights. Damn it, the first time I get pulled over and my Dad is here to witness it. I’m asking myself what the hell did I do wrong? My Dad wonders the same. He walks up to the passenger side where my Dad is sitting and tells me this. “Here are the reasons why I pulled you over, you cut a corner, you have a crack in your windshield, you have something hanging on your rearview mirror, and you sir (he looks at my Dad) are not wearing your seat belt……. License and registration please” Are you kidding me? So the sheriff walks back to his car to do his things and my Dad is just going off at him. “Stupid pigs I don’t care, when I get back and drive my truck I’m not going to wear my seatbelt, ever” If he wasn’t there I would have been scared shitless and probably crying. He comes back and I see he is holding a ticket. OH CRAP! He peers down and says “Sir, since you are the one not wearing the seatbelt, she is getting away scott free but you sir have to pay $107.00 on such an such a day”

About now I feel terrible! Sure its nice to know that I don’t have to pay for a ticket and I still don’t have anything on my record, but being that I got pulled over for the first time in my life and my passenger was the one that got the ticket, that’s just not right! The guy is 50+ years old!! I am only 22 and I don’t get fined at all? I felt just awful, but my Dad also said that it was a Friday before a big holiday weekend so the cops were out on mad force, and since these new “Click it or Ticket” ads are a hit, I’m sure he’s pulling over everybody. And sure enough when we came back the other way, he already pulled over somebody else. Not a lot of people can say that the first time they were pulled over by the police, their passenger was the one that got a ticket. I should feel special but I also feel 100% responsible, sad!

JP vs. Dead Deer

You would think driving 9+ years you would have probably seen everything that needs to be seen that involves you and the open road. Some may be considered bragging rights when you know that you are the only person that has ran over a dead deer and more importantly got pulled over by the cops but the passenger was the one who got the ticket. LETS BACK UP!!!! Dead Deer you say??? HA!!

You would think that living in Northern Minnesota and driving on poor, isolated two lane highways that run between state forests would probably make you believe that running into deer would not be that uncommon. But truth to be told, I have not once in my 4 and a half years of living and driving up north, hit a deer, but lets not knock on wood yet. My senior year, I decided to spend some of my holiday time with my newborn nephew here in the Twin Cities, so I drove the 4-hour trip with no complaints. No doubt leaving on a Friday night going up north on the interstate was not the smartest thing to do, not with a million other cars coming up north to their cabins. The un-thinkable happened on Interstate 94, 3 lanes of traffic, all going at a steady pace of 65mph. I was on the far left lane when I saw something big and hairy lying on my side of the road. I only reacted enough to make sure I hit it straight on, and make sure that I do NOT try and swerve out of the way. That would just be plain stupid with that amount of traffic. I ran over what felt like a 10ft square speed bump and heard nothing but a loud booming noise coming from somewhere beneath my car. When I hit the sucker, I had enough brains to check my rearview mirror to see if my sudden braking would cause a huge car pile up but all I saw was a trucks headlights bob up and down figuring he must of ran over the deer too.

I quickly parked on the side of the road and got out, I also noticed the truck also stopped right behind me. The first thing he said was “Are you ok?” Sure I was fine but my shaking hands told me different. I still had my car running and the booming sound was still there so I thought something happened to the engine, and of course I was wrong. The deer took apart my muffler. I finally got settled down enough to try and get back on the road but the fun wasn’t over yet. If anyone has ever driven a car with no muffler you know you feel my pain. Talk about LOUD! All you hear when you press down the accelerator is the loud booming sound and the constant vibrations on your body. The tough part was I still had 2 and a half hours left of driving ahead of me. Forget playing music, forget trying to stay sane, all you can do is just think “how white trash can I get?” I rolled down my windows to avoid the constant humming in my ears but found out quickly that was the 5th worst mistake of the day. The air suddenly made me want to vomit. Apparently I not only ran over the dead deer, I dragged the carcass just enough so some of the hair and flesh hung up on the bottom of my overheated car. I’m not just getting a giant headache from the non-existing muffler, but I’m getting nauseas from the burnt deer meat smell.

When I came back home to tell my parents, they all laughed at me and asked me why I didn’t bring any venison home. Hardy har har! But this story doesn’t end here, the most hilarious part was giving my car to my Dad’s mechanic, of course he knows him well so it was even more funny. He put my car on the hoist, lifted it up and put it back down again. He took one look at his assistant and told him. “Hose this piece of shit down!!” There was still meat and hair underneath my car in clumps!!! All wedged in every place possible!! I swear we would have to pay extra for that, but luckily he just warned us to never bring a car in like that again.

Intro To Driving 101

Some of us have some great driving stories that we like to discuss during family gatherings, most of them consits of completely idiotic, blonde haired women driving their fathers suv or young, immature kids out on the first run of the town. Sure we all get into a little bit of road rage, sometimes were are innocent but most times we are guilty as hell. Here are some of the horrors of being a young woman exploring the open highway.

I worked in Brainerd, Minnesota. Brainerd's traffic has got to be the worst kind of traffic combination I have ever seen. You have farmer Joe who doesn't know where his gas petal is, because he lost it 5 miles back on the side of the road and you have a Twin City's person (which I am now) going a gabizllion miles an hour so they can get to their cabin before hell freezes over! They are all together in one city, on one highway, oh yes! A couple honks here, a couple of middle fingers there, not that big of a deal. Unless you are used to that, like living down here in the metro

The one thing that I love about road rage is that I think its funny as hell! It all started when I first got my license and my Dad let me drive to the Cities for the first time. I pulled out on a couple of people, and I got the middle finger. I laughed hysterically and the only thing my dad said was "Stop laughing, it's not that funny" WHAT DO YOU WANT ME TO DO?!?! Run them over? get angry and kill us both ?!?! I screwed up, so what, no one died, everyone was able to get in the other lane before anything could of happend. Just laugh it off, flick him back and be done with it.

3/04/2005

The Bells, The Whistles, The Lights

Have you ever walked into a casino and felt that you walked into another planet. An adult playground where we hope for one push of a button, one flip of a card, one pull of the slots and we would become zillionaires. That is what strives people to return and fill the casino belly with our green tea leaves of life. For 4 years I have dreamt that dream, but alas I only come back empty or a half way full. The most I have ever won in a casino day was $300 playing nickle machines. I never spend more than $50.00 which to some, means a lot, or nothing.

The rush that you get when you see the dials spin and spin and spin waiting for 5 colors, shapes, 7's would be in a straight row and BOOM, the machine would explode spilling money in your lap and of course a security guard would jump out also. I saw a face of a thousandaire, 10,000 to be exact. She was a 30-40 year old women, short and petite and didn't seem too excited, or flushed in the face. She was with one of the Casino's "personal" who had a badge and they talked as if nothing had happend. Security had to rope off the entire section of poker, nickle machines and create a human wall so no one would get funny and try and mess with the machine. One security guy had a flashlight and was even checking around the machine to see if this 30-40yr old woman had rigged it, I guess if my casino lost 10,000 I would do a whole body, cavaity search.

A royal flush, on a nickle machine, it was playing a tune that repeated itself, the word JACKPOT bounced around the screen like some nintendo game. The human wall was just staring, wondering about what they would do with that money, pay for their house, car, their childrens education. I had a sick gut feeling while looking at the middle aged woman, I almost wanted to kick her to the ground and yell THANKS FOR GETTING MY HOPES UP KNOWING THAT I WILL NEVER WIN. ooooh if only I had sat there, at that particular machine, I would of walked out with my father like any other time I go to the Casino.. but this time I would have little more life in my step. Oh if only...if only...

3/03/2005

Another batch of fun videos

I think these can only be viewed in Windows Media Player
Here is a video of Micheal Jackson's video Thriller, all done in Lego's pretty funny stuff
This one is, well I can't quite explain it, just watch it...
Yay for another new video of the Shawshank Redemtion Remix check it out

3/02/2005

Here are some of my websites I made for a class

These sites will be listed on my links on the right of the page but I wanted to make sure everyone gets a chance to check them out.

All of these webpages were made in my Web Design and Content class here at BSU.
The first one is a How To page, and its called How To Annoy Your Roommate
The other one is a website that two other girls created, one of them was my roommate and its called Preparing For Dorm Life an inside look at how to live in the dorms, especially here at BSU. Check them out!!! Tell me what you think!

2/21/2005

Must......Go....Here

ahhhh Albinoblacksheep.com has got some fun stuff.
Here is a Napoleon Dynamite sound board along with Pedro Sanchezs
But my all time favorite, and needless to say, very addicting video is Milk and Cereal (pssst.. the guy on your left is very fine looking)

11/15/2004

A weekend in Cook Minnesota

5 girls who are all 21+, 2 cars, one small town. Sounds like a good time eh everyone? You bet! Anna, Carrie, Beth, Tresa and I all went to Cook Minnesota to spend a weekend at Carrie's house. I wish I could just stop there but no, something else happend that weekend, something that changed everyones outlook on life. We went to see a Chippendales show. That's right, Chip n' Dale! Men who wear nothing but a banana boat g-string, cuffs and a bowtie. I decided to get myself a little tipsy before the show actually started, downing the Coors Light like nobodys buisness. I did see one guy in the audience, but other than that there were people my age, women in their 50's, Grandmas and 2 pregenant women. We had great seats, a couple feet from the huge speakers, so we lost our hearing half way through the show. Then the show started, a total of 7 guys danced and showed off their bodies on stage, yipee.

Then it happend, I forgot that these dancers can come out to the audience. To my advantage I was sorta in the middle of a row so I was in good shape. I never did get a male lap dance, and I'm glad I didn't, but what I saw was horrible. Apparently women love to get their head humped. There was a grandma that was forced up on stage, and had to bend over and get a nice ol' hump from a huge African American guy, the sad thing is that I think she was enjoying it. My dear, dear, dear friend Carrie almost got humped, but she resisted and fought back for her freedom, he just messed up her hair so that sorta pissed her off. It was quite a site to see, a bunch of drunk women screaming their heads off to some guy who stuffs a sock in his banana boat. All I can say is that i've been there, done that, thanks Mr. Coors Light!

11/04/2004

Great, Grand, Wonderful

(This post I wrote while attending college, most of my friends who were involved in this activity enjoyed my responces, so I decided to keep this one and inserted it to this new blog)

Every now and then I get a little reminder of how "awesome" it is to live in the dorms, with an R.A. We are forced to go to monthly meetings with our floor where all we hear are complaints about hair in the showers, toothpaste in the sinks, crumbs on the stove and the sluts at the end of the hall who decides to ruin everyone’s joyful experience of living in the dorms. With all that aside, we must do floor activities where we force ourselves to put a smile on our face and be as happy as a clam. The best of all is "lets get to know everyone" games. You all have been through them even if you don't live in the dorms.

It must have been two weeks of being in school when we all were summoned to go down to the funky room as a floor and play games with one another. No one knew each other, other than the returnees (like me and a few of my friends) so our R.A. found a great way to break the ice. Lets each send out a piece of paper and everyone must write something nice about each other. No one knew anyone’s name, no one knew what they are like and no one knew anyone! What kind of game is that? Anyway, the papers went around a complete circle and when we got our own back, we had to fold it up and give it to our
R. A. And of course she had the bright idea of using thick felt markers to write on little pieces of paper so I couldn’t read any of it anyway. Two months later she put them in our mailboxes, I opened mine up and this is what it said.

1. You keep me sane in lit class (I’ve know this girl for 4yrs so this one is ok)
2. You are the best roommate EVER!(yup crazy Anna)
3. You seem like a cool person (popular response when you don't know them)
4. I like your door decorations (who doesn't?)
5. You seem to really care, and be a real leader (care? yes, a leader? no, not really)
6. Hysterically Entertaining (I think one of my friends said that, I should check on that)
7. Your food always smells good from the kitchen (phew, and I thought the food that I eat smells terrible.. hmmm)
8. Thank you for letting me follow you here (I don't think this counts as a complement)
9. I wish my hair was wavy like yours (yah I’m just growing it out, I hate it actually, but good luck)
10. You’re very open/cool ( I really like the /cool part)
11. Funny (smelling?.... looking?.. yah I have no clue either)
12. I like your enthusiasm (interesting.. didn't think I had one)
13. I like your stuffed animal (that was too easy, I had a stuffed frog there)
14. I guess I like looking at door deco, and you have some cool stuff on it (My door is more popular than me, is there a door fetish out there in the world? I especially like the
“I guess” part, the uncertainty is just oozing out of ya!)
15. You're a great yatch-y friend you always know who to make me laugh and smile (oh Carrie (heart), you had me at hello)

I know some of my responses to these so-called compliments seem a bit harsh but being a senior, I was just fed up with these stupid games.

So you can see, not a great activity for an icebreaker. I practically wrote the same thing on everyone else’s so I don't feel so bad anymore.